EP 3: It’s All By Grace…

There’s always that friend who doesn’t tell you what you want to hear, but what you need to hear…

I met Sam on matriculation day; I was taking pictures with my friends when he approached me with his. He didn’t say much, in fact, his friend, Ben, spoke. Apparently, he had told his friends how beautiful I am and they dragged him to take a picture with me. Perhaps someday I’ll share it. We exchanged contacts and he reached out during vacation.

I don’t know about you guys, but one thing that pisses me off is when a guy tries to shoot his shot without building any friendship. Seriously, who does that? “Hello, I’m Sam, the guy from the matriculation ceremony. From the very first day I set my eyes on you, I knew you were mine”. Dude, chill ok. Instead of coming at me with a proposal, how about simply asking how I’m doing, my course of study, in short, just getting to know me better?

Not to debunk the “shoot your shot” concept, but at least get to know me first.

I told him, right away that I wasn’t interested. Moreover, I had just gotten into the university and had planned how I wanted my life to unravel. Relationships were definitely not in that equation. For me, the perfect time to date was after Uni.

After that rejection, we clicked so well, I’m not sure how, but we became great friends. Sam is an extrovert who loves to talk, whereas I do not. He is direct, but I prefer to go around with words. I just feel saying things nicely wouldn’t hurt anyone, but Sam just tells you as it is.

The perfect opposite poles that did attract. Before you go wild with your imagination, Sam is just a friend.

He could have come in later in this story, but I think it is best to introduce him now. Although he wasn’t always around, we had a lot to talk about anytime we met. For me, Sam is the pivot of this story, and you will find out soon.

It was a Wednesday evening after mid-week service. He had come to visit some people in my hostel and felt it was just right to pay courtesy.

We took a stroll, talking about a trendy issue on campus at that time. Hmm, I knew there was a thing as a ‘sugar-daddy’, but I had no idea that girls my age were their ‘sugar-babies’. Guys, I was 16!!!

I went on and on about why I would never do something like that, and how I wouldn’t date till after school. In short, I judged those who were in such situations. I had such high expectations of myself that I never imagined any guy could sweep me off my feet. Funny, right?

He sighed and said, “don’t trust yourself too much. Perhaps, you are who you are today because God kept you from those things. Maybe, you would have done worse if you didn’t have the kind of parents and security whiles growing up”. I was getting defensive, but I knew he was right.

It’s all by grace… These words still resonate with me today because now I realize how God has kept me all these years. God, knowing our weaknesses, sometimes keeps us from being exposed to them, but we start to take that for granted, believing in our own strength.

I think that in our lives, we all need a friend like Sam, who will always be honest with us, even if everyone assumes we have it all figured out.

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